Tell me a joke

[BMR Genie]

"A guy finds a genie who offers him one wish. Already rich and happy, he asks to always climax at the same time as his wife.

A few weeks later, he’s back rubbing the lamp.

“Genie, I need to undo that wish.”

The genie asks, “Why? Did something go wrong?”

“No, it works fine. But picture this: I’m at the bar with my buddies, playing cards, having a beer... then boom—orgasm.”

 

[Franz555]

 

[Franz555]

 

[maltedhopsfrenzy]

A man and woman had been married for 30 years, and in those 30 years, they always left the lights off when having sex. He was embarrassed and scared that he couldn't please her, so he always used a big dildo on her.

All these years she had no clue.

One day, she decided to reach over and flip the light switch on and saw that he was using a dildo. She said "I knew it, asshole, explain the dildo!" He said, "Explain the kids!"

 

[DiggityDaggityDo]

 

[BMR Genie]

"After 20 years of marriage a husband and wife go to counseling. When asked what the problem is, the wife breaks into a passionate tirade of every problem they've ever had.
Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist gets up, walks over to the wife, makes her stand up and kisses her very hard. The woman shuts up and quietly sits down.
The therapist says to the husband, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?"
After a moment the husband replies, "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays I fish."

 

[BMR Genie]

 

[Tanko]

View attachment 62984

Was expecting the last box to say.... protologist instead of dentist.

Man, I am a sick person.

 

[BMR Genie]

Was expecting the last box to say.... protologist instead of dentist.

Man, I am a sick person.

Something close to the original request.

 

[maltedhopsfrenzy]

Little Johnny comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores. "Not yet," said Little Johnny..

His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he's a little pissed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken.

He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs and he kicks a pig.

He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.

"How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks.

"Well," his mother says, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cow, so for a week you aren't getting any milk."

Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen. Little Johnny looks up at his mother with a smile, and says:

"Are you going to tell him, or should I?"