Tell me a joke

[BMR Genie]

"Two old men are sitting in a bar.
One of them looks at the other & says
“You look familiar… where you from?”
The second old man replies “Ireland”
The first old man looks astonished & says
” No way I’m from Ireland myself, what a small world!”
The second old man then looks at the first “What city?”
The first old man says “Dublin?”
The second old man looks astonished
“No way I’m from Dublin meself! What a small world.”
The first man looks at the second old man “What school you go to?”
The second old man replies
“Saint Mary’s class of 89”
The first old man is absolutely baffled
” NO WAY Saint Mary’s class of 89 myself! What a small world!”
At this point, another man comes into the bar & says to the bartender
“Hey, Joe! Anything interesting going on?”
The bartender says
“Not really… but the Murphy twins are drunk again.”

 

[MinnesotaFats]

My grandmother died at my birthday party the other day. Massive heart attack. While we were all eating the cake. Keeled right over, in front of everybody.

Be careful what you wish for...

 

[BMR Genie]

My grandmother died at my birthday party the other day. Massive heart attack. While we were all eating the cake. Keeled right over, in front of everybody.

Be careful what you wish for...

Oh no! So sorry to hear this, Minny.

 

[lekidecincinnati]

My grandmother died at my birthday party the other day. Massive heart attack. While we were all eating the cake. Keeled right over, in front of everybody.

Be careful what you wish for...

any inheritance coming

 

[MinnesotaFats]

Guys- that was a joke. Birthday wish joke...

 

[BMR Genie]

Guys- that was a joke. Birthday wish joke...

Damn! I need to re-read it again haha.

 

[lapenti]

Guys- that was a joke. Birthday wish joke...

Must have been an old, nasty, RICH grandma.

Savage lol

 

[RRsilver]

Damn! I need to re-read it again haha.

Minny made Genie cuss. Damn it, man.

 

[BMR Genie]

 

[RRsilver]

 

[edawg]

Local Barber is cutting hair guy sticks his head in the door and asks how long for a haircut? Barber says about an hour. Guy says thanks and goes. Barber tells the guy in the chair that same guy does that everyday and never comes in to get his haircut no matter what I tell him I wonder where he goes? The guy getting his haircut says he goes over your house to visit your wife and not to worry about the shave today.

 

[lapenti]

On his deathbed, an old Jew says to his wife.....​

“Oh, Sarah, when the shop burned down you were right beside me.”
The wife nodded dutifully, “I was, Moshe”
He labored a bit and then said, “When the Nazis drove us out of our beloved Deutschland you were beside me again.”
The wife tearfully said, “I was, Moshe”
“And now you're at my death bed, aren't you?”, added Moshe.
The wife replied, “I am, darling.”
The old Jew sighed, “I'm starting to think you're bad luck, Sarah.”

 

[BMR Genie]

On his deathbed, an old Jew says to his wife.....​

“Oh, Sarah, when the shop burned down you were right beside me.”
The wife nodded dutifully, “I was, Moshe”
He labored a bit and then said, “When the Nazis drove us out of our beloved Deutschland you were beside me again.”
The wife tearfully said, “I was, Moshe”
“And now you're at my death bed, aren't you?”, added Moshe.
The wife replied, “I am, darling.”
The old Jew sighed, “I'm starting to think you're bad luck, Sarah.”

Moshe making his final joke.

 

[BMR Genie]

"It's a boy!" I shouted with tears rolling down my face.

"A boy!"

It was at that moment I vowed to never visit Thailand again. "

 

[JDS]

"It's a boy!" I shouted with tears rolling down my face.

"A boy!"

It was at that moment I vowed to never visit Thailand again. "

Pretty ass baby dick ladyboy be creepin’

 

[maltedhopsfrenzy]

While playing golf today, on the 8th hole I hit my 2 best balls…..

…..I stepped on a rake.

 

[phillyflyers]

Here's a math problem joke I thought you guys might enjoy....

Mary's bakery bakes 100 chocolate chip cookies for the new sales day. Bobby came in and bought 5 cookies. Jamal sticks Bobby up and steals 3 of Bobby's cookies.

What colour is Jamal?

 

[Franz555]

 

[Franz555]

 

[Franz555]